(1) I am Robert Kernodle,.. the newly-exorcised body of a formerly-possessed no-name annoyance known as "someguy". I learned to make art during my pre-exorcised body state whereby the mind of a great Zimdarian master spoke to me from the Mother Ship of a pimped-out battle cruiser from ZimdarSEE FOOTNOTE, the home planet.
(2) My preferred technique or medium is hot air, but (in lieu of this) my second most favorite medium is active fluid mixtures (EXcluding human waste products). See FLUIDISM.
(3) The process I use in creating my art is (a) waking up in the morning to see whether the sun is shinning, (b) taking note of how much old paint I might have left over that has not dried out yet, (c) looking to see whether I have any film in the frige to shoot with, and (d) if I can get my act together before good light goes away, setting up to obsess upon and hopefully capture some fascinating primal geometry of the cosmos.
(4) In my MIND, everything is art. In my BODY, only what I like is art.
(5) I have been making art since before the dawn of time, since I personally am ONLY a small part of the whole process, which is the universe.
(6) In my opinion, the greatest period of art history starts with my own re-coining of the term, "FLUIDISM", which synchronizes with and helps coordinate a new epoch in human understanding in all areas-- art, philosophy, science, consciousness, being, meaning... (yeah,.. right).
(7) I attach myself to NO artistic movements. Anything I might resemble...I stumbled upon independently in the great cycle of ignorance and rediscovery.
(8) I feel that society at large (adult obesity rate doubled, and childhood obesity rate tripled since 1970's) prefers a greasy meal over art's visual appeal.
(9) My all time favorite artist is me (selfish *@#*!).
(10) My favorite museum has not been built yet,.. because I would include a health club, disco and dating service teaching mandatory responsible birth control,.. along with the regular visual viewing galleries.
(11) You may use a photo of my work for your assignment, ONLY if you are hot (or lie to me that you are) with experience in yoga, gymnastics, message therapy and acrobatic hoola hoop. Otherwise, I must request a small fee of a box of grapefruits (it IS the holiday season, you know).
FOOTNOTE
I shamelessly thieve usage of the word, "Zimdar", from the artist known as "dots" (aka, Jay Smithline). Dots made up the whole idea, and I want to give him due discredit. You know what they say: "Copying is the greatest form of flattery." I've been looking for a letter from dots' lawyer for some time now, informing me of his zillion dollar infringement suit against me (oh, by the way, I'm thieving dots' affection for the word, "zillion", too-- make it an even two zillion).
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